Silly Christmas Poem

To provide something silly for Christmas with a serious point about the meaning of the festival

by Gordon and Ronni Lamont

Suitable for Whole School (Pri)

Aims

To provide something silly for Christmas - with a serious point about the meaning of the festival.

Preparation and materials

The Silly Christmas poem is a performance poem and will need to be rehearsed in advance by good readers with a sense of timing. As written it is split into four parts, but these are interchangeable and expandable, as long as Four (the joker) is always the same person.

Assembly

Introduce the 'Silly Christmas Poem' and invite everyone to sit back and enjoy!

ONE		Christmas
TWO		Time
THREE		Mistletoe
FOUR		And wine

ONE		Glitter
TWO		Snow
THREE		Presents
FOUR		D'oh

ALL		D'oh?
FOUR		The Simpsons Christmas special
ALL		Oh ...
FOUR		No, D'oh!
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Stars
TWO		Trees
THREE		Decorations
FOUR		'Ye's

ALL		'Ye's?
FOUR		O come all ye faithful, Ye three kings, Ye wish you a merry ...
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Christmas
TWO		Time
THREE		Mistletoe
FOUR		And whine - ing

ALL		Whining?
FOUR		(whines) Oh why didn't I get that ... it's not fair ... Mum, Mum, why can't I get up yet ...
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Shepherds
TWO		Angels
THREE		Bright new star
FOUR		Visitors

ONE		Camels
TWO		Gifts from afar
FOUR		Gifts for the car

ALL		Gifts for the car?
FOUR		Aunt Mabel always buys Dad a sponge and some car shampoo. He must have twenty unopened super car cleaner gift boxes. He even ...
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Partying
TWO		Carolling
THREE		Crackering
FOUR		Ding a ling ...

ONE		Laughing
TWO		And frolicking
THREE		Wallace
FOUR		And Gromiting

ONE		Christmas pudding
TWO		Christmas cake
THREE		Christmas turkey
FOUR		Christmas holly and tofu spicy vegetarian bake ... It's for Aunt Mabel.
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Baby
TWO		In stable
THREE		New life
FOUR		Aunt Mabel

ONE		Aunt Mabel?
FOUR		Er, it's rhyming slang. Aunt Mabel, new table, one leg's higher, welcome Messiah!
ALL		Thank you, we get the idea.

ONE		Baby
TWO		So small
THREE		New life
FOUR		For all ...

ONE		Live life
TWO		To the full
ALL		Even Aunt Mabel.

Time for reflection

Dear God,
Thank you for fun, for getting together with friends and family.
For presents and games and things to eat and drink.
Thank you that you want us to celebrate and have fun at Christmas time.
Thank you that we're all invited to the party.
Amen.

Song/music

(sung to the tune of 'Jingle Bells')

Christmas bells
All is well
We're all having fun.
Games and jokes and things to eat
Joy to everyone.
Oh, Christmas bells
All is well
We're all having fun.
It's party time for the new-born babe
And everyone's welcome.