Secondary: Current Assemblies
LOVE IS . . . AND ISN’T!
Valentine’s Day
By
Stuart Kerner
 Suitable for Whole School
Aim
To consider the reason for the traditions of St Valentine’s Day and the nature of Christian love.
Preparation and materials
- A tomato
- A glove
- Four small pieces of paper and four pens or pencils
- A small box or container
- Ten students: six male, four female
- The Bible passage is based on 1 Corinthians 13.4–7, 13.
- Background information: There are two third-century martyrs by the name of Valentine who are supposed to have been martyred on 14 February. One is a Roman priest; the other a bishop of Terni in central Italy, who was martyred in Rome. Little that is reliable is known about them, and it has been suggested that the two Valentines are the same person. Neither seems to have had any connection with romantic love.
Assembly
- Does anyone know what I am saying?
Ana Behibak (to a male, Arabic)
Ami tomAy bhAlobAshi (Bengali)
Ik hou van jou (Dutch)
Je t’aime (French)
Ich liebe Dich (German)
Ti amo (Italian)
Nakupenda (Swahili)
Seni seviyorum (Turkish)
‘Rwy’n dy garu di (Welsh)
I’m saying ‘I love you’ in different languages. In English we sometimes talk about ‘three little words’ but this sentiment can be said in any number of ways and in any number of different places.
- The feast of St Valentine, 14 February, is the day when romantic love is celebrated and we show our love and affection by sending cards, flowers and special messages to people we care about. I hope you’ve not been disappointed today.
I wonder who got the most cards?
I wonder who got the biggest teddy bear?
I wonder if there are any red roses left in the shops?
An American lady, Miss Esther Howland, is given credit for sending the first valentine card. Commercial valentines were introduced in the 1800s and now, just like Christmas, the day is very commercialized.
We all hope for a card from a secret admirer and the newspapers are full of messages.
(Read out a selection of fun and serious examples.)
‘My heart is empty without you,
Like a bird without a song.’
‘Your hair is brown like the finest chocolate.
Your eyes are beautiful like the finest piece of art.
Your slightest touch makes me lose all my worries.
That is why it can only be you that is meant for me.’
‘Your smile is my sunrise, your kiss is my sunset.
Thank you for being the most wonderful friend and companion.’
‘If a day had 36 hours I’d spend 12 picking u flowers,
If we had 48 life would surely be great,
And if it was 72?
I’d climb a mountain just to tell the world i love you,
But . . .all we have is 24,
Which means i’ll keep the message short,
And simply spend every precious hour with you,
Today n forever.’
‘MY BIRDY
HAPPY VALENTINES, SENDING LOADS OF SNOGS AND BOTTOM PINCHES, ALWAYS BE A PLACE IN MY HEART FOR YOU XXXXXX’
‘I hope this stops the nagging . . .I mean Bumbles you are beautiful!’
- Valentine’s Day started in the time of the Roman Empire. In ancient Rome, 14 February was a holiday to honour Juno, who was the queen of the Roman gods and goddesses. The following day, 15 February, began the Roman festival of Lupercalia.
- Now, I’d like to conduct a social experiment. (Pick up the tomato.)
I need first of all a boy to hold this tomato. (Give tomato to student volunteer who stands with it at the front.)
Next I need four girls to write their names on these pieces of paper. (Ask the girls to stand at the front and give the girls the paper and pens. While they are writing, give the next instruction.)
I’d like another boy to hold this glove. (Give glove to student volunteer who stands with it at the front.)
Before the girls return to their places I just need to do one more thing. (Indicate the boys with the tomato and the glove.) I’d like you to give the tomato and the glove to one of these four girls. You may choose the same girl, you may choose different girls. When you’ve done this, all six of you may return to your places. (Allow time for this to be done.)
Good. That’s the first part of the experiment in place. Let’s move on to the second. I need four more volunteers, all of them male. (While four new volunteers are coming to the front, fold the pieces of paper on which the girls’ names are written and place them carefully in the container.)
I’d like each of you to take one piece of paper from the container, unfold it and read out to us the name written on it. (Read out the names and acknowledge the individual girls, who are now seated in the audience. The girl or girls who are holding the tomato and glove must indicate this. Keep the four boys at the front.)
- We’ve just re-enacted part of the Roman festival of Lupercalia. I deliberately missed out the parts where the Romans sacrificed a goat and a dog, and where young, single men slapped young, single women around the face with strips of goatskin!
In Roman times, young boys and girls were kept firmly apart. However, during the festival of Lupercalia one of the traditions of the young people was name drawing. On the eve of the festival the names of Roman girls were written on slips of paper and placed into jars. Each young man would draw a girl’s name from the jar and the two would then be partners for the duration of the festival. Sometimes the partnership lasted an entire year, and often partners would fall in love and would later marry.
To the traditions from the festival of Lupercalia, I added Valentine’s Day traditions taken from medieval times. The tomato never used to be eaten. It was purely decorative and was known as the love apple. A love apple was given to your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day and she would prize it until it became old and wrinkly.
What’s the glove got to do with it? You put the glove on and you take the glove off. Take the G from glove and what remains? LOVE!
- For most of us, Valentine’s Day is a bit of fun. In a way it’s another learning experience – learning how to relate to one another as something more than friends.
But what is love? We have only one word in the English language for such a wide variety of different relationships:
– mother/child love
– the love of friends
– sacrificial love
– love for your country
– love for the team
– love for a pet
– sexual love.
Love is the glue that helps keep relationships together.
- St Paul was a member of that same Graeco–Roman world that our festival ritual came from. In a letter to people who lived in the Greek seaport of Corinth, Paul wrote a description of what love meant to him as a Christian. (It’s in the New Testament section of the Bible, chapter 13 of Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians, if you want to look at it again.)
It’s often used at weddings nowadays as it contains a lot of good sense for marriage partners, but its wisdom applies to every relationship. The words have been rearranged slightly so we can hear the balance of what love is and what love isn’t.
‘Love is patient; love is kind
and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude;
never selfish, not quick to take offence.
There is nothing love cannot face;
there is no limit to its faith,
its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things that last forever: faith, hope and love;
but the greatest of them all is love.’
Time for reflection
Liking people comes naturally.
Loving them seems a little bit harder.
Loving means considering them, and what they want, as much as what we want.
Loving means letting them be themselves and accepting them for who they are.
Loving means learning to repair mistakes.
Prayer
We’re wearing ‘L’ plates, Lord,
‘L’ for learner and ‘L’ for lover.
Help us as we trust one another and learn to love.
Amen.
Song
‘It’s a new day’ (Come and Praise, 106)
|
